originally posted 7-30-01
I've reworded this a few times when posting it on specific jobs, but you get the idea.
Twenty five years in construction has given me a great deal of insight inside both the contractor’s and the homeowner’s minds. I’ve come up with a set of guidelines that get posted on all major jobs, and if the homeowners don’t laugh at least once, I know I’m in trouble. Here they are, followed by brief, but useless explanations:
1. THAT’S EXTRA. I won’t raise my prices during the job if you won’t change your mind again.
2. PAINTERS WILL FIX IT. You expect carpenters to know something about joinery? Of course caulk is structural.
3. THAT’S NOT CODE. This gives us the chance to catch up as you and the architect go crazy making changes (see #1) to remain legal. In Eureka, it should go “That was code according to the LAST inspector.”
4. YOU WON’T SEE THAT. We’ll fix it, or it’ll be covered with sheetrock, or some such nonsense (see # 2). The further up it is, the less we have to worry about how it looks.
5. IT’LL HOLD. All we had were six penny finish nails to attach the roof, so we used superglue. Or, “liquid nails never fails!”
6. OF COURSE WE’VE DONE THIS BEFORE. If the whole crew shows up with brand new tools and spends all morning reading instruction booklets, you’re in trouble.
7. PERMIT? WHAT PERMIT? Sometimes goes “License? What license?” Often coupled with # 8,
8. WE ARE OUR INSURANCE. A very dangerous situation, especially when they show up with wooden ladders and circular saws that have the blade guards removed.
9. I AM NOT YOUR COUNSELLOR. If you and your spouse haven’t worked out your architectural differences yet, just keep #10 in mind.
10.DEER SEASON STARTS NEXT WEEK, WE’LL BE BACK IN FEBRUARY. Usually followed by, “Kin we git a ad-vay-unce?”
Monday, August 3, 2009
QUICK FIXES FOR THE CHEAPSKATE
originally published 7-29-05
Dear Old House Doctor,
While hiding behind my house to see who was parked illegally, I noticed that the wood trim around my windows had separated at the corner joints. It’s only been five years since my painter charged me eight hundred dollars to paint my trim. Should I sue?
Signed
Worried on Hillside
Dear Worried,
My my. Suing a painter for wood movement five years after the fact is like blaming George the Lesser for doing what Karl Rove tells him to; it’s to be expected.
Wood is a porous substance, and it shrinks and swells with the weather, usually moving radially (it moves sideways). The hot temperatures in summer cause shrinkage through moisture loss, and this is most noticeable at exterior wood joints. It goes without saying that after five years, this is likely. Then, you ask, why did I say it? Because this paper pays me a lot of money for such witticisms. Ha Ha! Just kidding! They don't pay me anything. In fact, I owe the editor BIGTIME, so she roped me into this crappy little... oh, sorry! Didn't know you were listening.
The next time you’re playing Gladys Kravits, put down your telescope and pick up a caulk gun. Using Dap’s “Alex Plus” (it’s a latex caulk with silicone for added elasticity), caulk the cracks and work it in with a wet finger (oh my!), smoothing as you go. After drying, paint the corners with an oil-based primer and touch it up with new paint.
Now, at this point, you’ll notice your new paint looks brighter than the surrounding trim. This might be caused by the cheap paint you insisted on using (see if you can sue your parents for your upbringing), or your trim might be dirty (sue God: She could use a good laugh and has extra thunderbolts lying around for twits like you). If dirt is the culprit, I have a weird remedy.
Simply rub your hand over the dirty parts of the trim and rub it onto the new paint after it cures. It’s weird, but it works.
And if there was really justice in this world, you can hire Karl to do the job after he’s fired. But he’ll likely charge you more than eight hundred dollars.
Dear Old House Doctor,
While hiding behind my house to see who was parked illegally, I noticed that the wood trim around my windows had separated at the corner joints. It’s only been five years since my painter charged me eight hundred dollars to paint my trim. Should I sue?
Signed
Worried on Hillside
Dear Worried,
My my. Suing a painter for wood movement five years after the fact is like blaming George the Lesser for doing what Karl Rove tells him to; it’s to be expected.
Wood is a porous substance, and it shrinks and swells with the weather, usually moving radially (it moves sideways). The hot temperatures in summer cause shrinkage through moisture loss, and this is most noticeable at exterior wood joints. It goes without saying that after five years, this is likely. Then, you ask, why did I say it? Because this paper pays me a lot of money for such witticisms. Ha Ha! Just kidding! They don't pay me anything. In fact, I owe the editor BIGTIME, so she roped me into this crappy little... oh, sorry! Didn't know you were listening.
The next time you’re playing Gladys Kravits, put down your telescope and pick up a caulk gun. Using Dap’s “Alex Plus” (it’s a latex caulk with silicone for added elasticity), caulk the cracks and work it in with a wet finger (oh my!), smoothing as you go. After drying, paint the corners with an oil-based primer and touch it up with new paint.
Now, at this point, you’ll notice your new paint looks brighter than the surrounding trim. This might be caused by the cheap paint you insisted on using (see if you can sue your parents for your upbringing), or your trim might be dirty (sue God: She could use a good laugh and has extra thunderbolts lying around for twits like you). If dirt is the culprit, I have a weird remedy.
Simply rub your hand over the dirty parts of the trim and rub it onto the new paint after it cures. It’s weird, but it works.
And if there was really justice in this world, you can hire Karl to do the job after he’s fired. But he’ll likely charge you more than eight hundred dollars.
BACK FROM THE ABYSS
"Well, I'm back."
Does anyone recognise this quote? It's cool, I'll wait.
Hum de dum de dum....
Oh, alright, I'll tell you. It's the last line from J.R.R. Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings." Spoken by Samwise after returning from the Grey Havens.
I have also returned, or at least, my computer has. While writing the first posts to this VERY blog, my cursor started opening everything it touched, then all things went snappy. My hard drive went to the Great Technologique Museum in Lyons, France, and I was without. Now I'm within.
The first two posts (the ones before this one) are examples of the most recent incarnation of OHD, and now I'm going to embark on reprinting some of the famous Lovely County Citizen colulumns. At three hundred fifty words, they are brief, informative, and manage to make fun of everyone in Eureka Springs Arkansas, where The Citizen is published.
I will be editing each one for some content, though, as the myriad readers of this blog (all none of you, heh heh) will have any idea why the jokes are so funny. Neither did anyone in Eaky Spings.
But no matter how much I make fun of the old hippies, artistes, and foaming-at-the-mouth nosy neighbors (a sanctioned competition sport in Eureka), I urge you to go there, walk the town, buy art and jewelry, and discover the wonderful food, libations, entertainment, and boffo characters the town has to offer. A mix of San Fransisco (architecture), Arkansas (hills, local flavor and forests), Greenwich Village (lifestyles and art), Switzerland (topography), and Disneyland (everything you were and weren't expecting), it's a ton o' fun. Write me and I'll give you the gory details.
Enough!!!
Back to the show, which is already in...progressssssssss........zzzzzZZZZIP!
clack
Snapple
POP!
*
"Well, I'm back."
Does anyone recognise this quote? It's cool, I'll wait.
Hum de dum de dum....
Oh, alright, I'll tell you. It's the last line from J.R.R. Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings." Spoken by Samwise after returning from the Grey Havens.
I have also returned, or at least, my computer has. While writing the first posts to this VERY blog, my cursor started opening everything it touched, then all things went snappy. My hard drive went to the Great Technologique Museum in Lyons, France, and I was without. Now I'm within.
The first two posts (the ones before this one) are examples of the most recent incarnation of OHD, and now I'm going to embark on reprinting some of the famous Lovely County Citizen colulumns. At three hundred fifty words, they are brief, informative, and manage to make fun of everyone in Eureka Springs Arkansas, where The Citizen is published.
I will be editing each one for some content, though, as the myriad readers of this blog (all none of you, heh heh) will have any idea why the jokes are so funny. Neither did anyone in Eaky Spings.
But no matter how much I make fun of the old hippies, artistes, and foaming-at-the-mouth nosy neighbors (a sanctioned competition sport in Eureka), I urge you to go there, walk the town, buy art and jewelry, and discover the wonderful food, libations, entertainment, and boffo characters the town has to offer. A mix of San Fransisco (architecture), Arkansas (hills, local flavor and forests), Greenwich Village (lifestyles and art), Switzerland (topography), and Disneyland (everything you were and weren't expecting), it's a ton o' fun. Write me and I'll give you the gory details.
Enough!!!
Back to the show, which is already in...progressssssssss........zzzzzZZZZIP!
clack
Snapple
POP!
*
Monday, July 20, 2009
Tighten Your Nuts, Not Mine
Originally published in ECOS in March.
Dear Old House Doctor,
While digging under my kitchen sink for some unsavory household chemicals, I noticed that the particle board floor in the cabinet was wet and sagging. Where in the world is this moisture coming from, and more importantly, am I doomed?
Sagging in Hillcrest
Dear Sagging,
There’s no doubt about it: you’re doomed.
Whether you believe in God or The Big Bubble, Allah or Murray The Kinky Monkey, medical science has proved that we’re all doomed. Sure, with a program of healthy eating and exercise, you might live to be ninety or a hundred. But if that involves nursing homes, Ensure cocktails and colostomy bags, wouldn’t it be better to burn out at sixty while experimenting with trendy chemical amusements and younger lovers while bowling with explosives?
I know that’s the way I intend to go.
As to your sink base, most moisture problems are caused by leaking drains. Don’t knock into them while digging around for the roach spray; drains are sensitive and easily offended.
Here’s what you do.
Fill your sink with an inch of water after you empty the cabinet space below. Have towels ready to soak up what leaks (don’t use good towels). Then pull the basket and watch where the water comes out. Chances are, you need to hand-tighten (I said HAND tighten; no wrenches) the compression nuts on your P-trap (the s-shaped drain tube) under your sink. Do this GENTLY until no water comes from the drain.
If, on the other hand, your drain isn’t leaking, turn on the faucet at full force and crawl further into the base with your flashlight. Be careful not to go too far! There’s a huge gulf back there, and if you fall into it, you’ll be trapped in the lacteenth dimension with large-breasted women with no sex drive. Don’t want to go there!
Look up below the faucet and see if that’s what’s leaking. If it is, you’ll have to buy a ‘faucet wrench,’ a device you’ll not be able to use for anything else but tightening your faucet compression nuts (oh my! don’t tighten MINE!).
Check all connections with the appliances on: dishwasher, disposal, and bong-water isomerization co-conversion unit, if you have one, you stoner. If you don’t find the leak do it all again. Put six inches of water into your sink before you drain it. Sometimes your underground drains are so constricted that it takes a larger amount of water to cause the backup.
Okay, you found the leak and tightened the connections. What do you do about the mass of wet particle board?
Knock it out and remove it. Use a dust mask; that crap is nasty and likely loaded with mold and formeldahyde. If the framing below is intact, use ¼´plywood to replace it, but be warned!
WARNING! WARNING! DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!
You must use two pieces, as one cannot be put in the cabinet retroactively. It just won’t fit. Make sure to match the two pieces where a piece of framework falls below it.
See how simple all that was? God, I don’t know how your species survives.
I need a drink.
Got an old house question, concern, or want to learn more about Murray the Kinky Monkey? Write me at this blog or at king.oldhousedoctor@gmail.com and I’ll fill your head with wicked thoughts.
Dear Old House Doctor,
While digging under my kitchen sink for some unsavory household chemicals, I noticed that the particle board floor in the cabinet was wet and sagging. Where in the world is this moisture coming from, and more importantly, am I doomed?
Sagging in Hillcrest
Dear Sagging,
There’s no doubt about it: you’re doomed.
Whether you believe in God or The Big Bubble, Allah or Murray The Kinky Monkey, medical science has proved that we’re all doomed. Sure, with a program of healthy eating and exercise, you might live to be ninety or a hundred. But if that involves nursing homes, Ensure cocktails and colostomy bags, wouldn’t it be better to burn out at sixty while experimenting with trendy chemical amusements and younger lovers while bowling with explosives?
I know that’s the way I intend to go.
As to your sink base, most moisture problems are caused by leaking drains. Don’t knock into them while digging around for the roach spray; drains are sensitive and easily offended.
Here’s what you do.
Fill your sink with an inch of water after you empty the cabinet space below. Have towels ready to soak up what leaks (don’t use good towels). Then pull the basket and watch where the water comes out. Chances are, you need to hand-tighten (I said HAND tighten; no wrenches) the compression nuts on your P-trap (the s-shaped drain tube) under your sink. Do this GENTLY until no water comes from the drain.
If, on the other hand, your drain isn’t leaking, turn on the faucet at full force and crawl further into the base with your flashlight. Be careful not to go too far! There’s a huge gulf back there, and if you fall into it, you’ll be trapped in the lacteenth dimension with large-breasted women with no sex drive. Don’t want to go there!
Look up below the faucet and see if that’s what’s leaking. If it is, you’ll have to buy a ‘faucet wrench,’ a device you’ll not be able to use for anything else but tightening your faucet compression nuts (oh my! don’t tighten MINE!).
Check all connections with the appliances on: dishwasher, disposal, and bong-water isomerization co-conversion unit, if you have one, you stoner. If you don’t find the leak do it all again. Put six inches of water into your sink before you drain it. Sometimes your underground drains are so constricted that it takes a larger amount of water to cause the backup.
Okay, you found the leak and tightened the connections. What do you do about the mass of wet particle board?
Knock it out and remove it. Use a dust mask; that crap is nasty and likely loaded with mold and formeldahyde. If the framing below is intact, use ¼´plywood to replace it, but be warned!
WARNING! WARNING! DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!
You must use two pieces, as one cannot be put in the cabinet retroactively. It just won’t fit. Make sure to match the two pieces where a piece of framework falls below it.
See how simple all that was? God, I don’t know how your species survives.
I need a drink.
Got an old house question, concern, or want to learn more about Murray the Kinky Monkey? Write me at this blog or at king.oldhousedoctor@gmail.com and I’ll fill your head with wicked thoughts.
PAINTING 101
This is a re-post of my latest colulumn, widely read in The Emerald City of the South, a local paper of wished-for ill repute in Little Rock. As I wrote the article in May, when "pools of slimy water" were rife in the state, the lead in the actual paper is a bit, well, misleading. I've re-written it here, so if you are confused, blame the bong, not me. If my editor Glen Schwartz would read his e-mails (or if I sent them before his somewhat arbitrary deadline), it would read like this.
Howdy Glen!
Ah, the days of heat and dry weather are upon us again. And though the daily drenching of spring is far behind us, I’m sure that you’re missing the daily drenching, the pools of slimy water, and the relatively cool 85-degree days. This is, however, a primer on what to do to spruce up the old homestead now that the sun has come out again. To burn you to a small, black cinder.
Now, I understand that most of you are drooling morons, with no more idea of what to do to keep up your most significant investment than how to breed stem cells. But someone has to look after you while quietly laughing behind your back. That person, is, of course, Joe Biden.
No no no! Just kidding! Joe Biden has no idea how to keep up a house, either. He’s been a politician for hundreds of years, and so he DELEGATES people to paint his house. If he was to pick up a paint brush, he’d be just as useless as you. Except that he’s vice president, of course. That should count for something.
So here I am to teach you how to do the only thing that most homeowners are qualified to do, and that is PAINT. Oh, I know. You know how to use a plunger, and the fact that you learned about the disposal’s reset button makes you think you’re as educated as Bob Vila. Trust me, Bob Vila has nothing on you, other than a huge bank account and more need to delegate than Joe Biden. He’s a snake-oil salesman, people. He has less of an idea how to actually perform repairs on an old house than you. Don’t listen to him; listen to me. I’m going to give you a basic education in painting the outside of your house.
For starters, DON’T PAINT UNPAINTED BRICK. All that does is inform people smarter than you that you’re more of a maroon than they thought before. Brick is porous and must remain so. This colulumn concerns WOOD houses. I’ll teach you about brick later.
Painting is a mixture of two tasks; preparation and application. Preparation of your surface takes the most effort and time, and if not done properly, your paint job will not last, so listen up, and do this stuff in the order I’m telling you.
SCRAPE your flaking paint with a CARBIDE scraper. This little beauty will cost you about twelve bucks, will never dull (as opposed to steel scrapers that dull merely on exposure to air), and you will thank me for this advice later. Catch your flakes on a tarp or dropcloth and throw them in the trash. These flakes contain lead which will penetrate the ground and create a layer that your dogs will find, dig up, and eat. Then they will die a horrible, painful death. I know I joke around here, but I’m not making this up, people. It happened to mine because my house’s former owners didn’t catch the flakes.
SAND your wood with 60 or 80 grit PRODUCTION PAPER. This type of sandpaper is tan (as opposed to red garnet paper) and will last longest. If you have a lot of sanding to do (and you do, don’t you, precious?), invest in a ¼ sheet electric sander, preferably Makita. It’s the best fifty bucks you’ll spend until your dealer has his autumn harvest overstock sale, you old stoner, you.
WASH your now-sanded wood with a DAMP (not wet) cloth to remove the dust. Dust, moisture and sunlight are the archenemies of paint.
WORK one side at a time, preferably small areas. The longer you leave your naked wood exposed (oh my!), the less likely it will hold paint.
PRIME your wood with one THIN coat of high-quality oil-based primer. DO NOT USE LATEX PRIMERS!!! Even if you use cheap paint (don’t), it will last longer with good primer. I prefer Benjamin Moore “Fresh Start.” You should have it tinted to the same color as your paint. ALWAYS PRIME BEFORE CAULKING!
CAULK your wood spaces anywhere water might penetrate with Dap “Alex Plus” siliconized acrylic caulk. It stretches and moves with your wood better than Painter’s Caulk. Once you apply a thin bead, WORK it with your finger, WET it with a SMALL amount of WATER, and WORK it again to SMOOTH it out. And stop using so many CAPITAL LETTERS for emphasis, for chrissakes. It makes you sound like a junior-high health teacher that normally teaches shop. You had one of those too, eh?
CHECK your wood surfaces to see if the primer raised any grain; if it seems rough or hairy (yikes!) rub some 100-grit sandpaper over it LIGHTLY to smooth the surface. If primer comes off, prime it again where it does.
PAINT with high-quality EXTERIOR latex paint. The higher gloss the paint, the longer it will last, but the more surface discrepancies will show. I prefer Benjamin Moore “Mooreglo” soft-gloss. Buy it in 5-gallon buckets or mix your gallons together before applying to assure even color. Apply it in TWO thin coats, and don’t spray it. Spraying may seem to be a time-saver, but the action of pressing the paint against the wood will give you a longer-lasting paint job. If you MUST save time, apply the paint with a small roller and brush it out. DON’T APPLY IT TOO THICK! It will bubble and fail, just like you did in high school calculus. And don’t paint in direct sunlight; it dries the surface of the paint too quickly, trapping still-wet paint beneath. Bubble and fail, bubble and fail.
BUY good brushes and good rollers for the task (alright, you should have done this before #5). Cheap rollers shed fibers and you can’t possibly paint a straight line without a good brush. I prefer Purdy “Nylox” for latex and Purdy white China Bristle for oil-based paint. Wash them thoroughly each day with warm water (Nylox) and mineral spirits (China Bristle). Use a paint comb to clean them thoroughly, and let them air-dry after cloth-drying them, preferably with the covers OFF, then put the covers ON. That way they’ll maintain their shape. At twenty-three bucks a brush, you'll want to maintain them. Full-sized roller naps can be cut down to fit small roller frames. Get good ones, now! Purdy, again, makes the best.
DRINK a few beers when you finish. It’ll get that primer taste out of your mouth.
WRITE me back at this blog or at king.oldhousedoctor@gmail.com with any questions regarding your old house. Maybe you’ll be made famous in this widely-read colulumn or blog. Then again, maybe the authorities will finally be able to track you down.
HIDE in the attic when you see the blue lights outside.
Toodle pipski! See you on the other side!
Howdy Glen!
Ah, the days of heat and dry weather are upon us again. And though the daily drenching of spring is far behind us, I’m sure that you’re missing the daily drenching, the pools of slimy water, and the relatively cool 85-degree days. This is, however, a primer on what to do to spruce up the old homestead now that the sun has come out again. To burn you to a small, black cinder.
Now, I understand that most of you are drooling morons, with no more idea of what to do to keep up your most significant investment than how to breed stem cells. But someone has to look after you while quietly laughing behind your back. That person, is, of course, Joe Biden.
No no no! Just kidding! Joe Biden has no idea how to keep up a house, either. He’s been a politician for hundreds of years, and so he DELEGATES people to paint his house. If he was to pick up a paint brush, he’d be just as useless as you. Except that he’s vice president, of course. That should count for something.
So here I am to teach you how to do the only thing that most homeowners are qualified to do, and that is PAINT. Oh, I know. You know how to use a plunger, and the fact that you learned about the disposal’s reset button makes you think you’re as educated as Bob Vila. Trust me, Bob Vila has nothing on you, other than a huge bank account and more need to delegate than Joe Biden. He’s a snake-oil salesman, people. He has less of an idea how to actually perform repairs on an old house than you. Don’t listen to him; listen to me. I’m going to give you a basic education in painting the outside of your house.
For starters, DON’T PAINT UNPAINTED BRICK. All that does is inform people smarter than you that you’re more of a maroon than they thought before. Brick is porous and must remain so. This colulumn concerns WOOD houses. I’ll teach you about brick later.
Painting is a mixture of two tasks; preparation and application. Preparation of your surface takes the most effort and time, and if not done properly, your paint job will not last, so listen up, and do this stuff in the order I’m telling you.
SCRAPE your flaking paint with a CARBIDE scraper. This little beauty will cost you about twelve bucks, will never dull (as opposed to steel scrapers that dull merely on exposure to air), and you will thank me for this advice later. Catch your flakes on a tarp or dropcloth and throw them in the trash. These flakes contain lead which will penetrate the ground and create a layer that your dogs will find, dig up, and eat. Then they will die a horrible, painful death. I know I joke around here, but I’m not making this up, people. It happened to mine because my house’s former owners didn’t catch the flakes.
SAND your wood with 60 or 80 grit PRODUCTION PAPER. This type of sandpaper is tan (as opposed to red garnet paper) and will last longest. If you have a lot of sanding to do (and you do, don’t you, precious?), invest in a ¼ sheet electric sander, preferably Makita. It’s the best fifty bucks you’ll spend until your dealer has his autumn harvest overstock sale, you old stoner, you.
WASH your now-sanded wood with a DAMP (not wet) cloth to remove the dust. Dust, moisture and sunlight are the archenemies of paint.
WORK one side at a time, preferably small areas. The longer you leave your naked wood exposed (oh my!), the less likely it will hold paint.
PRIME your wood with one THIN coat of high-quality oil-based primer. DO NOT USE LATEX PRIMERS!!! Even if you use cheap paint (don’t), it will last longer with good primer. I prefer Benjamin Moore “Fresh Start.” You should have it tinted to the same color as your paint. ALWAYS PRIME BEFORE CAULKING!
CAULK your wood spaces anywhere water might penetrate with Dap “Alex Plus” siliconized acrylic caulk. It stretches and moves with your wood better than Painter’s Caulk. Once you apply a thin bead, WORK it with your finger, WET it with a SMALL amount of WATER, and WORK it again to SMOOTH it out. And stop using so many CAPITAL LETTERS for emphasis, for chrissakes. It makes you sound like a junior-high health teacher that normally teaches shop. You had one of those too, eh?
CHECK your wood surfaces to see if the primer raised any grain; if it seems rough or hairy (yikes!) rub some 100-grit sandpaper over it LIGHTLY to smooth the surface. If primer comes off, prime it again where it does.
PAINT with high-quality EXTERIOR latex paint. The higher gloss the paint, the longer it will last, but the more surface discrepancies will show. I prefer Benjamin Moore “Mooreglo” soft-gloss. Buy it in 5-gallon buckets or mix your gallons together before applying to assure even color. Apply it in TWO thin coats, and don’t spray it. Spraying may seem to be a time-saver, but the action of pressing the paint against the wood will give you a longer-lasting paint job. If you MUST save time, apply the paint with a small roller and brush it out. DON’T APPLY IT TOO THICK! It will bubble and fail, just like you did in high school calculus. And don’t paint in direct sunlight; it dries the surface of the paint too quickly, trapping still-wet paint beneath. Bubble and fail, bubble and fail.
BUY good brushes and good rollers for the task (alright, you should have done this before #5). Cheap rollers shed fibers and you can’t possibly paint a straight line without a good brush. I prefer Purdy “Nylox” for latex and Purdy white China Bristle for oil-based paint. Wash them thoroughly each day with warm water (Nylox) and mineral spirits (China Bristle). Use a paint comb to clean them thoroughly, and let them air-dry after cloth-drying them, preferably with the covers OFF, then put the covers ON. That way they’ll maintain their shape. At twenty-three bucks a brush, you'll want to maintain them. Full-sized roller naps can be cut down to fit small roller frames. Get good ones, now! Purdy, again, makes the best.
DRINK a few beers when you finish. It’ll get that primer taste out of your mouth.
WRITE me back at this blog or at king.oldhousedoctor@gmail.com with any questions regarding your old house. Maybe you’ll be made famous in this widely-read colulumn or blog. Then again, maybe the authorities will finally be able to track you down.
HIDE in the attic when you see the blue lights outside.
Toodle pipski! See you on the other side!
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