THE OLD HOUSE DOCTOR

12-21-01

GRANDPA

          “Why, back in MY day,” Grandpa said as he sat on the pile of rubble that was once the Crescent Hotel, “we had ALL kind of tech-know-logical marvels….. ONLY THE PEOPLE WHO LIVED HERE WERE TOO LAZY TO USE ‘EM!!!” The group of children at his feet were taken aback by his tone. No one spoke loudly and vehemently about opinions since the PC Act of 2023. Grandpa continued. He didn’t hold to PC.

          “Sure as kin be, and you don’t believe me!” he spit. “Why, those lazy bugggers wouldn’t even go out in the rain to look at their houses to see where the water was soaking the woodwork!” The kids yawned. Old people DO rave.. “And NOW look around you.” He swept his arm widely, nearly bowling over Tquiera. “None of the old buildings left.” A heavy sigh was heard. The children looked around.

          He was right. They had all seen pictures of the town back at the turn of the century, and at the turn of the century before. It was beautiful, with a rich mix of stone, iron and wood architectural elements. The early city had built in the trees, then had stripped the forest around it. The restored city of the late twentieth century had a robust mix of buildings and trees, but the population elected to preserve the trees and ignore the buildings. The trees grew, and the buildings declined.

          The scene in the Eureka valley was a mixed jumble of foliage, plastic, chrome and lines that held no concert with one another. Curves fought with angles, and war waged between the natural and the artificial.

          “It’s the people’s fault,” Grandpa sniffed, a tear coursing unevenly down his wrinkles. “Stupid PEOPLE didn’t know what they had. One of the most fantastic cities in creation, and their petty bickering let it slip through their hands…” He trailed off. M’lina turned to ask, “Why?”

          “Why?” Grandpa repeated, looking at her eager face and smiling. It was a question seldom asked in these days of political conformity. “Because people were CHEAP, that’s why. Because they valued their leisure time above their architecture. Because they would rather watch their properties disintegrate and complain about it, than to get off their lazy butts and keep them up.” The children were giving him their full attention now. He narrowed his eyes and told them the awful truth. “Because they would rather argue against their neighbor in a public forum than be seen with a hammer in their hand.” They gasped.